“LEAVE? TO GO WHERE?”
She was sitting in a patio chair, snuggly wrapped in her blanket. Silently, she watching the waves come and go, crash on the rocky shore. Her mug of coffee had gone cold in her hands, her gaze lost at sea. There were just too many memories from this place that haunted her under the pale moonlight; she couldn’t run away anymore. At the edge of the world, she was alone with her ghosts. And they were so loud.
– Leave? To go where?
The girl laughed at the incredulous face he made. He was always so safe, needing a plan for everything.
– It doesn’t matter, now does it? We can go anywhere! Just you and me, and the stars.
He seemed so unsure, unable to really give in to complete randomness and her crazy whims. They were opposites; she was a wildcard, free and unpredictable, unpredicting, and he was steady and so sure of his path. But they did say opposites attract. Part of him wanted to see where this would go. It was summer, after all, and he could afford a vacation before fall. So he shrugged.
– Why not? Let’s go.
He smiled at her eagerness and echoed:
So they grabbed a few things and jumped into his truck, and they just drove until the first rays of sunlight kissed their skin; they had reached the ocean and couldn’t go any further. They wandered in the still sleeping town and ended up on the beach. They played in the waves and laughed so hard they forgot who and where they were. It was like time stopped and the world had given them a little peace of heaven. Two stars at the edge of the world, shining ever so brightly.
It was summer, so they rented a small house by the water. There were parties on the beach at sunset. There were new friends to meet every day. They didn’t want to go back, they wanted to stay forever in this perfect world they had created for themselves. Time couldn’t catch them here, they were flying so high. She was so high. Untouchable. Invincible.
Then, there were more parties. And there were other girls. And he left. And she was all alone. And the beach house that had been a cosy nest felt huge and empty. Hollow. Just like the space left in her chest.
They had been incredibly happy, even if for just a while. The sun was gone now and fall was at her doorstep. The cold wind brushed away the leftover warmth still clinging to her skin, just like she held on to her memories. But summer was over and it was time to go back. So she looked at the waves one last time. One by one, she gifted her memories to the gods of the sea. And with them, her pain. Only then could she get up, and shewalked out the door to never come back, leaving the keys on the counter.
“Leave? To go where?”
The words echoed in her mind.
– Let’s go back home, she whispered to the moon.
Home, where she could heal and be whole again.